At Home (WARNING: This is a "huggy-feel good" blog)

A friend recently, quite randomly asked me, "Are you close to your sisters?".

"Sure, yeah...mostly!" was my quick answer.  Then I had to ask her, "Why did you just ask me that?".

Her response was that over time she had observed my oldest daughter and I interact. She said that it seemed we were always so close and had a good relationship. So, from that, she assumed it was the same with my sisters and I.

I was happy to quickly answer her with, Yes, my sisters and I are close, however...just like with my daughter, it takes work.

Serena and I

Let me assure you, it's not just on my part. Off the bat, I would say, my daughter is one of the most forgiving people I know. She overlooks her mother's imperfections and loves me in spite of who I can be sometimes.

I'd say the same for my sisters (brothers too!). Only they can testify of my testiness over the years. It's not always been easy for them to be "at home" with me, whether as a child sharing bedrooms, clothing, or boyfriends (just throwing that one out there...not sure we did that) or now as adults, all the kid stuff, holidays, preferences, differences in lifestyle, or whatever. So before this sounds like a personal horn-tooting session, it is not! They each are equally responsible in their own way.

Recently, it seems that I've heard at least three times (and this somehow makes it noteworthy to write about here in my land of personal blog) of family members sharing how awful their relationship is with a sibling or parents.



Me and Marme

 One, I had to sit and endure listening to two peers go through a mother-bashing session. I'm not saying my mother has arrived to perfection, nor has our relationship, but how sad to hear these adult women spend so much time and energy sharing amongst peers how dreadful their mothers and their actions were. It saddened me and I'm certain it would have their mothers as well.

Two, I heard recently of sisters who had been estranged for years. In spite of the best efforts of one, nothing would change.

Three, in contrast, I heard someone say how "at home" they were with their

spouse. Knowing both of them, I knew, they understood a key ingredient to good relationships. These three

reminded me people truly do long for good relationships.

But here is what I really wanted to say, RELATIONSHIPS take WORK! Sometimes, it requires "taking the hit", when that other one is down in the mouth or running low in the giving department, or whatever the lacking between you/he/she may be. This is way hard to do. And I'm not setting myself up as a perfect exmple of it. However, I've seen it time and time again, heal in what could be a broken relationship. It works!

God is big enough, He is huge, He can handle anything that might come along and not be His best will for individuals. I can liberate myself of that in relationships and continue to love, give, and even ENJOY the relationship. Just as so many people have done with me.

And this is how I'm able to continue to enjoy my sometimes not so enjoyable children. I do my part by loving, encouraging, and giving when I can to the unlovely child. God will take care of the imperfections, much, much better than I can. He may choose to, He may not. It's not for me to "worry" with.

I do know this, Jesus Himself, sacrificed his life in Love, for some pretty undeserving humans, utterly hateful toward his Father. How can I/we do less? Following His example is the only way we can truly be "at home" with other human beings. As I dwell on that, how thankful I am for those that are Christ's example to me. It provokes me to know Him more...and that's what relationships truly are all about!

My Sisters that God has blessed me with!

Romans 8:17...and if children, then heirs—heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him.